Pride Gets in the Way

This week I am on a road trip.

One of the ‘benefits’ of home assignment as a missionary is getting to travel, a lot. I am on my way to visit three of my supporting churches. For this round of visits I am driving. This is providing me time to stop to see the sights and to see friends along the way.

shanTuesday night I arrived at the house of long-time friends where I am known as Aunt Shan. What a blessing to have the honor of being an aunt! One of the greatest joys of being in this house is the heart sharing that happens.

As I read today’s chapters in John, I felt like it was a summary of what I had read the past two weeks about prayer and the Holy Spirit. Here was Jesus teaching the disciples, directly, about prayer and promising the help of the Holy Spirit. I thought maybe God wanted me to do a follow up on one of those topics.

Then I arrived at my friends’ house. My feet were not literally washed, but the same servant attitude greeted me at the door, by every person. When I was feeling ill yesterday morning, I was prayed for and cared for.

I reread John 13-17 and saw Jesus’ humility, washing His disciples’ feet, submitting to the Father’s will, praying for us, for me. I looked around me and saw Jesus’ humility being demonstrated tangibly.

My pride gets in the way of so much ministry and love. I don’t want to look bad or dumb or like I don’t know what is going on. I want people to think I am a competent person, in every situation.

Then I read about Jesus. Then I read Jesus’ words:

  • “Do you understand what I have done for you?”
  • “Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.”
  • “As you sent me into the world, I have sent them into the world.”

Then I look at the people in the house where I am staying.

I hear the stories.

I see the actions.

Jesus’ love is evident everywhere.

Humility is a virtue that is real and see-able.

Then I look into my own heart.

Sure there has been improvement over the years, but even in writing that my pride shows! Pride is everywhere in this little heart of mine.

Oh, how I long to have a heart like His, fully submitted to my Father, unwilling to worry about what others think of me. I want to understand what He did for the disciples in washing their feet, what He did for me in following His Father’s plan, and what He means in sending me out into the world.

Mostly, I want to know this humble Jesus who loves me and prays for me.

Who models Jesus’ humility to you?

Where do you see Him working on pride in your life?